axolotl.

i am a baby

at the age of 19

i want to grow up more 

than anything.


i want to be better

smarter

braver

yet every time


i cower into my little bubble

pink, smooth, wide eyed

twitching, my hands scrabbling

for anything i can.


all the lungs/gills in the world

and i still cannot breathe

when i’m afraid,

i back under my rock and cry

i need to be better

step up

crawl up 

onto land and be grown…


but not today.

not today.

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